


Tom's dream

by Terrygo



Category: Chalet School - Elinor M. Brent-Dyer
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-15 14:15:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 6,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29437377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Terrygo/pseuds/Terrygo
Relationships: girlfriend/girlfriend
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

“Sounds like a bad situation all round “Tom remarked to Bride on hearing about events in Switzerland.  
“Very bad “Bride agreed “but in truth Tom, I am not surprised at Len blowing up. I confess her getting together with Ted came a bit out of the blue, but then perhaps not, they have always been very close.”  
“Are you alright with that? “Tom was seemingly casual.  
“Oh yes, it doesn’t bother me, I suspect Ted will be very good for Len, perhaps give her the confidence the poor girl needs.”  
“How did it get so bad? It can’t just be a recent thing surely.”  
“No, it’s been going on for years, Joey always expected Len to be the responsible one, to look after the others, whilst at the same time allowing Con to daydream because she took after her, a writer, and Margot to slack because for a brief time when younger she was frail.”  
“That hardly seems fair, Len is the eldest by what, half an hour, they all should have pitched in.”  
“Well Joey didn’t expect them too and they rarely thought of it on their own.”  
Tom nodded thoughtfully “Poor Len, its hard on her now but Jack seems to be rallying round, it may be the best thing in the long run.”  
“Well Madge is being supportive, so you may well be right.”

Later Tom lay in bed thoughtful, it was a surprise that Len and Ted were an item, yet was it? The truth was you could rarely tell just how people felt. Nancy Wilmot and Kathie Ferrars were a good example, most people knew they were an item even though they tried to hide it, an unlikely pair, even more unlikely than Len and Ted.Hilda and Nell, well perhaps, they were certainly close. She sighed, could she ever show how she felt, she thought not, the daughter of a bishop, brought up in the church, it would hardly go down well. Besides the person she cared for showed no inclination of feeling the same, they were just good friends, but then she brightened slightly, that’s all Len and Ted had appeared to be, maybe there was hope for her.


	2. Chapter 2

Bride came to her “I could use your help”  
“You’ve got it, what can I do for you?”  
“Len and Ted are going to live together whilst at college, Len cannot return home, the situation with Joey is untenable. Jack has asked if I could find them a suitable house to rent.”  
Tom whistled “Things must be bad then, sure, I’ll be glad to help, but how on earth do we start, I’ve no clue.”  
“Nor have I but we can find out, thanks Tom”  
“No problem, best thing for them really, new start and all that, time to find themselves.”

Bride thought over the day, Tom was such a good friend, she was glad they had kept in touch after school. They had spent the day answering adverts, checking with estate agents and making plans to visit houses the following day. She hadn’t realised just how much hard work it could be, yet Tom had made it fun. She was hopeful that they would find a suitable house for Len and Ted, one in particular had caught her eye, it seemed perfect. With that she got ready for bed and enjoyed a well-deserved sleep.  
“So this one? “Tom asked standing outside the little terraced house they had found.  
“Its central to both colleges, rent seems ok, nice area, yes this one “Bride nodded “I’ll get a provisional hold on it and check with Jack but I really think this will do them nicely.”  
“Good, right then, let’s get back to that estate agent, sort that out and then eat, I am rather hungry “with a laugh.  
“It’s on me “Bride told her “it’s the least I can do for all your work.”  
“I’ve enjoyed it; I’ve learned something “Tom assured her “but if you are offering I won’t say no “with a grin.  
It didn’t seem long before the day Len and Ted planned to move in.Unknown to them Bride had arranged for Kathie and Nancy to visit to help, they had become good friends and supporters of the younger couple. Steve had also said he was going to turn up and could she find him a bed for a few days. The house had been scrubbed, not Tom’s favourite occupation but she did it cheerfully, and whilst doing so Ros popped into her mind.  
“Isn’t she a good friend of Len, should we invite her?”  
“Oh good idea, it will hopefully help them and I am sure they would love to see her.”  
The plans were made and soon the group were waiting for the arrival of Len and Ted.Furniture and parcels had been arriving all morning but they had been left untouched, waiting for the new occupants of the house.  
“It’s their house after all “Nancy said “we are just Santa’s little helpers.”  
“Rather large helpers “muttered Kathie looking round at the tall people surrounding her “I’m the only one who qualifies”  
“And you do it very well “Nancy assured her with a grin, which earned her a stern look.  
Bride saw the two girls turn up outside “Quiet everyone “and dashed out to greet them. There was a slightly tricky moment when Ted thought she recognised Nancy and Kathie’s car but Bride quickly ushered them inside.  
Len and Ted’s faces as Bride opened the living room door and showed them the friends gathered there were well worth seeing. The others laughed and hugs were exchanged all round.  
“You must be Ted”Tom extended her hand “I’m Tom, Brides friend, I’m handy with tools and things.”  
Ted took her hand “Good to meet you, thank you for coming to help. I confess, not being a housewifely type of person, that the thought of getting everything organised really scared me.”  
“Oh we’ll just do what we are told “Tom laughed liking the other the girl “let those who enjoy it get on with it.”  
They all worked hard before going to their various rooms


	3. Chapter 3

They all worked hard before going to their various rooms for the night, ready to return the next day to finish off and celebrate a little. The second day wasn’t as chaotic and they all had time to chat and get to know each other better. Tom liked the look of Ted and felt she would be a good companion/partner for the more mentally delicate Len. It was obvious how they felt about each other and truth to be told she was a little jealous. This was how she wanted to be with the girl of her dreams, but it was just that, a dream. She sighed to herself as she finished fitting a plug, perhaps one day it might come true.  
They ended the day with an impromptu party and Tom again found herself talking to Ted.She tried casually to ask some questions and how she and Len got together.Ted was amused, it was obvious to her what Tom was doing but she was kind and went along with it.  
“So it must have been hard, at school I mean “Tom asked sipping at her wine.  
“It was at times, but at that point neither of us knew that the other was thinking along the same lines-does that make sense-so we weren’t hiding a relationship, just our feelings.”  
“Was that easier?”  
“Seemed like it at the times, now I think we did wonders keeping it quiet”  
“Not grabbing Len and giving her a kiss you mean.”  
Ted laughed “Something like that but I certainly wanted to at times, but not knowing Len felt the same way I could hardly act upon those thoughts.”  
“It’s still going to be hard for you both.”  
“Oh absolutley”Ted agreed “we know that, not everyone will be accepting or approve but we are willing to risk it”  
“It will be worth it I suppose”  
“Well worth it, that doesn’t worry me”Ted was firm.  
“What does?”  
“Oh Joey, Len’s mother”Ted sighed “She’s against us and is being pretty horrible right now.”  
“She might come round “Tom offered.  
“She might but somehow I doubt it!”

Tom busied herself with her boy’s club, enjoying teaching woodwork and other useful skills. One of the highlights of the year was the making of the doll’s house for the school fair. The structure became more complicated as time went by and the boys were always eager to help her. She never seemed attracted to anyone, a thing Bride commented on one evening as they shared some wine at her place.  
“I’ve never felt the urge or need “Tom told her “Maybe I’m just not the getting married kind.”  
“I wonder myself “Bride admitted “I confess at times it does seem appealing, to have a partner, to be married, be secure, you know”  
“I understand you, I imagine its most girls dream “with a little laugh “but then again perhaps not so much these days.”  
“I don’t know, I know some people who have just got divorced, not sure how I feel about that, I’ve always been taught that marriage is for life.”  
“Not always though, and I think that is a good thing that people can have some freedom if they have made a mistake “Tom was thoughtful “Can’t imagine anything worse than being stuck with someone that you no longer love”  
“It sounds pretty awful “Bride agreed “hopefully it won’t happen to me, or you for that matter.”  
“Can’t see me marrying “Tom said with a slight laugh “Doesn’t appeal in the slightest right now.”  
“Fifty-fifty here, I imagine if I meet the right person I will know.”  
“I would think so, hope so “Tom was slightly wistfully, she knew, the other person didn’t, that was her problem.  
Bride went out with a few young men, nothing lasted very long and she was a little disappointed.  
“You’ve just not met the right one yet “Tom said bracingly.  
“That’s for sure “Bride sighed “they were nice enough but I felt no spark, no connection, I certainly don’t want to spend the rest of my life with them.”  
“You don’t have to “Tom laughed “You are still young, plenty of time”  
“Are you sure “Bride asked wryly “younger girls than me are married, I feel old”  
“I suspect some of them didn’t do it for love, but because they felt they should, or family pressure. “Tom told her “It is rather the expected thing still, something I am happy not to conform with”  
Bride sighed “That is true, I sometimes feel I am letting people down, that I should do as they want or expect”  
“Don’t be pressurised, you are still young no matter how you feel”  
“So are you, you might change your mind.”  
Tom laughed “I doubt it; I cannot see myself marrying any man.”  
“Nor can I right now, ah well, who knows what the future might bring. After all Joey never wanted to marry until Jack came along and even then she took ages to realise it.”  
“Hmmm, now they have a large family but are perhaps not the best advert for married life “Tom said seriously.  
“Perhaps not “Bride agreed “perhaps not.”


	4. Chapter 4

“I need your help again please Tom “Bride rang Tom.  
“No problem, what do you need?”  
“It’s Len and Teds graduation today. Joey has gone missing from Switzerland and they think that she might be here in the UK.  
“Was she invited?”  
“No, but when has that ever stopped her, besides her mental health has been dodgy, she is probably not thinking logically.”  
“So what do you want me to do?”  
“Jem is going to watch the doors at the hall but obviously he cannot cover all of them, David and Rex are coming, will you come with me, I confess I would feel better if you did.”  
“Of course I will, I’ll come round now”  
Jem greeted them, being joined by Hilda and Nancy, and allocated doors “Just try to keep her from going in if she turns up “he told them “one of you come for me if necessary.”  
The pairs were all a little anxious “She’s our aunt for goodness sake “David said to Rix”how do we stop her?”  
Rix shrugged “Just do the best we can, Len has worked hard for this moment, we can’t let it be spoilt.”  
“Oh, I know, but it’s a darned tricky situation all round.”  
“She might listen to you Hilda “Nancy was saying.  
“I doubt it, she still hasn’t forgiven Nell and I for banning her from school, but we must do our best.”  
Bride felt like David, Joey was her aunt, she was determined to do her best but it wouldn’t be easy. She was glad to have the dependable Tom by her side at this moment.  
They waited, scanning the crowds, hoping not to see Joey, hoping their fears were unfounded yet anxious in case they missed her. It seemed that they were as time passed slowly “Not much longer before they shut the doors “Bride muttered “hopefully its ok.”  
“You’ve probably jinxed it “Tom said with a slight laugh.  
“Oh I hope not “Bride looked horrified at the thought.

The crowds grew quieter and Bride and Tom set off to find Jem.As they approached him they realised he was talking, or arguing, with Joey who was demanding that she went in.Jem was refusing to let her, talking quietly but firmly, Bride and Tom stood silently behind him. In the end he persuaded her that she would not be let in, that she was not wanted and in any case the doors were now closed.  
“Do you think she has gone? “Bride asked Jem.  
“For now “he sighed “What she will do next I don’t know.”  
“It’s very sad “  
“It is indeed, come on let’s all go for a coffee”  
The mood in the café was sombre, they hadn’t wanted to be right and strangely it hurt that they were. Tom felt a little in the way, this was a family thing, and she muttered as much to Bride who instantly said “No, stop, don’t even think that, we are having a little celebration for the girls and you are definitely invited, I want you there “and of course how could Tom refuse this request.  
As they arrived at Madge’s house Joey appeared much to everyone’s dismay. Len spoke to her, not the gentle, easy going girl that Tom was used to but an older, stronger Len, Tom was amazed at the change. Finally, once again Joey left with Jack and Len insisted that they carried on with the celebration, not wanting the day to be spoilt any more than it already had been. Tom felt sorry for the family, they were all obviously trying to deal with a very difficult situation.  
“Sorry you had to see that “Bride apologised as they went back to her house “not pleasant”  
“I feel for you all, how on earth do you deal with something like that. Surely its more than just a dislike of Len and Ted?”  
“Yes Jem is suspecting some form of mental illness, perhaps depression, she is very unhappy with her life.”  
“How can I help?”  
“Just by being you and listening “Bride smiled slightly “trust me, it helps.”


	5. Chapter 5

They went for a walk a few days later in a local park, taking a seat by a pond and lazily watching children feed ducks.  
“I used to do that “Tom remarked “wonder if the poor ducks ever get sick of bread.”  
“Better than going hungry I suppose “Bride seemed a little distracted, Tom waited, she presumed Bride would tell her in due course.  
Bride talked around things for a little while until she mentioned “I met someone last week.”  
“Met in what way? “Tom asked slightly puzzled.  
“Well I suppose I am attracted to him “Bride blushed.  
“Oh, tell me about him “Tom kept her voice light but couldn’t help feeling dismayed, this would change the dynamics of the friendship.  
“He is called Simon and he is a barrister, I met him at one of mothers parties, you know the type of thing “with a slight laugh.  
“Fundraiser”  
“Exactly, anyway we chatted for a while and he has invited me out for dinner.”  
“Are you going?”  
“Well yes, I think so, I’m not sure.”  
“If you like him you should at least give him a chance “Tom said “after all you might hate his table manners, he might slurp his soup”  
Bride laughed, relieved her friend had taken the news so easily” Oh Tom, you make things seem so fun.”  
“I aim to please, so have you arranged a day?”  
“Tuesday at that new restaurant in Bank Street, I’m a bit nervous to be honest.”  
“Of course you are, only natural “Tom said matter of factly”Got something to wear?”  
“Shall I buy new?”  
Tom laughed “You are asking me, how on earth would I know?”  
Bride smiled” Oh I know, but I do value your thoughts”  
“We need someone who understands these things, who do we have nearby?”  
“Will you come?”  
“Of course, I’ll be handy for carrying bags “Tom said with a grin.

Later that night, alone in her flat, Tom felt miserable, Bride’s news was not what she wanted to hear, nor happen “But it has “roughly rubbing her eyes “and its jolly well up to me to help and support her, and I will! “With that thought she went to bed where she spent a sleepless night tossing and turning.


	6. Chapter 6

Bride had contacted two other friends and the four of them set off on a shopping trip. Tom was not excited, shopping bored her but she was determined to be supportive and positive. Bride knew her and knew how she was feeling, she laughed “I’ll buy you lunch to make up for it “she promised, grateful that Tom had been willing to come. The other two were excited however and the whole thing was fun, Tom put up with it and kept up a cheerful front.  
Later she sat with a coffee in her flat staring out of the window. It wasn’t a great view but she wasn’t seeing it anyway. She was facing the change that would happen in her life, somehow she felt that Bride would see a lot more of Simon which would mean she would see less of Bride and obviously the friendship would be altered.  
Simon did indeed stay around and although Bride still wanted and needed Tom she had less time to spare. Tom busied herself with her clubs, but still found herself, at least at first, with time on her hands. She was bored she admitted to herself, her usual pursuits were not engaging her as much, and she missed her frequent meetings with Bride.  
She was surprised to meet Len and Ted one day whilst shopping. After a little chat Len realised that Tom was missing Bride and, being Len, invited her over to their house for a meal. Tom gratefully accepted, she liked the pair and looked forward to getting to know them better.

“You do realise that Tom rather likes Bride”Ted asked as they put away their shopping.  
“They are good friends “Len acknowledged.  
“No, I mean in a you/me type of way”Ted explained.  
“What, oh” Len looked surprised “well you may be right, but Bride has a boyfriend.”  
“Hence Tom feeling a little lost, lonely and not sure what to do with herself”  
“Poor Tom “now it was pointed out to her Len could see it.  
Tom turned up, a little nervous and was welcomed warmly by the two girls. They chatted easily about various things, including school, until after the meal when they relaxed in the living room by a cheerful fire.  
“You have the place looking nice “Tom commented looking around, comparing it with her own rather basic flat.  
“With your help “Tom smiled “We were both very pleased to see you all that day”  
They both knew Tom had something on her mind but unless she said something they couldn’t and she was in no hurry. It would mean actually admitting how she felt and she wasn’t ready to do that yet, not even to these two who she knew could be trusted.  
“How has your family taken this? “she asked eventually.  
“Mostly well, it’s only my mother that’s a problem “Len pulled a face “she will never accept us, but it’s not just that”  
“Len said no for the first time “Tom added “so we had two strikes against us”  
“Did you mean to tell everyone so soon?”  
“Help no “Len laughed “we had hardly got used to the idea ourselves, then dad knew, then Hilary, it was too fast really”  
“But it worked out?”  
“Mostly”Ted refilled wine glasses “we don’t regret it but it’s not what we would have chosen”  
Tom was silent for a little while “Might as well be honest with you two, I’m the same, my feelings are for another woman”  
Len and Ted nodded, they had already suspected that “Does she know? “Len asked gently.  
“No “with a short laugh “She’s not the same, we are friends, no more and now I can’t see it changing.”  
Len and Ted exchanged glances, they thought it was Bride, but Bride had a boyfriend, not great for Tom.  
“Sadly, that is possible”Ted said “but, this sounds trite, there may be someone else out there for you”  
“I don’t want anyone else, would you have accepted anyone other than Len? “Tom demanded.  
“Had Len rejected me then I think it would have been a very long time before I loved again”Ted admitted,  
“Then it’s the same for me, there is no other, and never will be.”


	7. Chapter 7

Despite her inner feelings Tom continued to support Bride, be an ear for her doubts and worries and, outwardly at least, be there for her friend. It hurt and she took to venting her feelings at Len and Ted who could do nothing, but listened and understand. Tom felt guilty about it at times but they assured her it was fine and she was grateful for their friendship and somewhere she did not have to pretend. She had admitted to them it was Bride, and was slightly surprised when they already knew.  
Bride announced her engagement and the families were pleased thinking it was such a good match. Bride however wasn’t sure, and poured her heart out to Tom. “I’m not sure that I love him, he’s nice enough, fun to be with but I am not sure there is any spark between us.”  
“Then why say yes? “a reasonable question.  
“I felt pressurised to, that I had to, everyone seemed to expect it”  
“But it’s your life surely”  
“With a family like mine “Bride laughed slightly bitterly  
“Don’t they understand?”  
“Not really, Joey is out of it of course, but my multitude of sisters and cousins seem to think it’s a good idea.”  
“All of them?”  
“No, not all to be fair, Len doesn’t think I should, Margot and Con don’t think either way, but the others, yes.”  
Tom found it hard to understand or accept, surely it was Brides choice in the matter, but she realised that many of the better off kind of families did seem to expect good matches. She was very glad that her parents didn’t seem to mind what she did in that way “It’s a good job “she muttered to herself “can’t see them being very happy”  
The day that Tom was dreading was approaching, Brides wedding. Bride had put her foot down at the suggestion she had all of her female cousins. “No, I only want a few “she said firmly.  
“Well who will be your chief bridesmaid? “her mother asked.  
“Tom”  
“Oh well, alright, she is a good friend “Mollie was slightly surprised.  
“Will she wear a dress?”Dick asked with a grin.  
“If I ask her, then yes “Bride was very sure on that. She solved her bridesmaid problem by picking only the eldest available female cousin from each family.  
Tom was rather stunned to be asked “Wouldn’t you rather have one of your family?”  
“No, I want you, you can handle everyone and everything, and you are my dearest friend”  
It was a learning curve for Tom but she dealt with it in her usual fashion, not afraid to ask advice if needed. She even put up with the measuring and creation of the bridesmaid’s dresses. She appeared in control, enthusiastic and happy for Bride, at night she cried herself to sleep.  
The wedding went well, as it should, and Tom breathed a sigh of relief as she went into the garden that night for a breath of fresh air. She was joined by Len and Ted, Len was a bridesmaid, Ted a guest, no one had queried it,Ted was a friend of Brides after all.  
“Pleased that it’s over?”Ted asked with a smile.  
“Oh yes, I’m glad that it went well but it hasn’t been one of my best days “Tom admitted leaning on  
“You handled it well “Len told her gently.  
“Hiding my broken heart you mean “Tom laughed softly “Bride is my best friend, there is no way I would have let her down, but only we three know the truth”  
“And we won’t be telling anyone “Len promised.  
Life went on as it tends to. Tom saw less of Bride which she totally expected, hated but expected, after all the husband had to come first.


	8. Chapter 8

Tom expanded her boy’s clubs, started some girls clubs and after a few years found herself running an active charity. Money came from donations and Bride was always generous, Simon was too but mainly because of how good it made him look rather than he actually cared. Tom knew this and didn’t care, she was happy to take the money. She sometimes missed the early days of the club when she was teaching herself, so now and again she did that, visiting one of the clubs and helping out. In its way it was a busy and satisfying life, she was certainly making a difference to many young lives but on a personal note she was lonely. Even worse when Len and Ted moved to Switzerland to teach at the Chalet School. It left her with another gap in her life with no one she could trust and talk to even though they exchanged regular letters.  
Bride watched her friend blossom and in some ways was jealous. Simon was always busy, often leaving her alone and she wasn’t the type to go shopping or spend endless hours lunching with others talking about nothing. She wanted to do something with her life. When she said as much to Simon he just laughed and told her not to worry about it, her place was at home.  
She longed for the freedom of her younger days, she admitted to herself that marriage was a mistake and there was little that she could do about it.One thing she was grateful for was that there were no children, it was a thing that bothered others but not her. What did bother her was the times she was left alone whilst Simon was at meetings. She mentioned it to Tom who looked serious and asked if there was any possibility that he was seeing someone else.  
Bride was shocked at first but then little things started to fall into place. He was distracted, not unkind, just not there, and as for at night, well this had never been good and was now non-existent. Bride took some of the blame for that, she had never really enjoyed the physical side of marriage.  
“What do I do? “she asked wide eyed.  
She talked to her parents and to Madge who she felt would understand, which she did, but also offered her a job, taking over the running of the schools. “I had planned on asking you anyway “Madge assured her “you don’t need to decide yet, take your time, you have enough going on right now”  
Bride was surprised, anxious that she couldn’t do the job, her confidence low after years of not being allowed to do much.  
“Shall I? “she asked Tom.  
“Of course you should “Tom told her in her forthright way “you can do it easily.”  
“But can I?”  
“Yes “Tom took no arguments.  
In the end it proved to be relatively simple, Simon accepted that he was at fault and the divorce went through.  
Bride accepted Madge’s offer and that lady was delighted to be able to see her retirement in sight.


	9. Chapter 9

Most of the family were accepting of the divorce, the first one in the clan history, some did not accept it, others were jealous and wished they could do the same. After all, as one said ‘being a CS girl does not prepare you for marriage, why should we put up with it because it is how things are done’  
Behind her, encouraging her in everything was Tom, busy herself running her charity she always had the time for her friend. Tom hadn’t changed very much, she dressed more stylishly, courtesy of Brides advice, but she was still the same honest forthright woman that she had been as a girl. People no longer asked why she wasn’t married, it was just how she was. She was however delighted when the Chalet school closed in Switzerland and came back to the UK.This meant Len and Ted were available to her again and she spent many nights in their house, chatting without having to watch what she said, and this was a great relief.  
“You never fell for anyone else?”Ted asked.  
“No, never, never will “Tom was very decided “If all we are are friends then friends we will be.”  
“Hard for you though.”  
“Yes, it’s not easy, you know that, but “with a wry smile “I cannot help having this tiny bit of hope to keep my dream alive”  
“Even though..?”  
“Yes even though it looks hopeless and pointless, there is still that dream “Tom sighed.

Bride became a patron of Tom’s charity and was soon involved helping with events and funding, like all charities funds were always an issue even though Tom kept her expenses to the minimum. She was rather surprised but delighted when Nancy rang one day offering the proceeds of the school summer fair.  
“There is not the same need anymore and you have helped us for so long so, we, as a school, want to give back”  
“I can only say yes please Nancy, I can always use money, but of course we will still be sending our usual model.”  
“Oh we need that, it is always a draw, even if they don’t want to win it people will still pay just to see it “Nancy laughed.  
“It’s funny how you can leave the CS”mused Tom as se went on with her work “but the CS never really leaves you, so many lives have been changed by it.”

“Come in “Tom cried, holding the door open to a laughing but soaking wet Bride “What on earth are you doing, where’s your car?”  
“Impulse visit “Bride laughed, taking off her wet coat “didn’t expect the heavens to open so I walked”  
“Well it’s good to see you, but you are soaked, let’s get you dry.”  
Tom turned to offer Bride a warm dressing gown and saw her friend with her hair loose around her shoulders, the light make up washed away, and in Tom’s eyes she looked adorable. She met Brides eyes and emboldened stepped forward and lightly kissed Bride on the lips. There was no resistance for a second then Bride stepped back to stare at Tom. There was silence for a moment then Bride grabbed her things “I’d better go” and dashed off into the rain leaving Tom standing wordless, her mind blank “What have I done?”  
After spending a sleepless night, she turned to the two friends that she knew would understand and was soon in Len and Teds cottage.  
“I kissed her “Tom buried her head in her hands “She just looked so adorable, what have I done?”  
Len and Ted looked at each other, unsure what to say “What did she do? “Len asked quietly.  
“She just looked at me, then said she’d better go and left, it was still raining too, I don’t know what to do. “Tom looked distraught “after all these years of being careful”  
“It might be alright Tom, after all Bride does know and approve of Ted and I”  
“Knowing about you two and me kissing her are two different things, she’ll hate me forever and I can’t take that “and the usually stoic Tom burst into tears.Ted moved across and held her, offering silent comfort where words would not help.  
Len looked at the pair wondering if ringing her cousin would help, to try to persuade her not to hate Tom, or reject her as a friend. “I’ll try “she decided “not today, give her a chance to think, perhaps tomorrow”


	10. Chapter 10

Bride had rushed home, arriving breathless and soaking wet, her mind churning, not knowing what to think or do. And yet, she admitted, she didn’t feel revulsion, it had felt better than any of Simons kisses “But I’m not like that, am I “she asked herself staring wide eyed into a mirror “Am I?”  
Len went to see Bride instead of just ringing her, she felt it might be easier to see Brides face and body language “Tom is heartbroken, she never meant to do that”  
“But why now? “Bride asked “she has never shown any inclination before”  
“Oh Bride, Tom has been in love with you from school days, she just never showed it out of respect for you and your friendship”  
“She has confided in you two, I’m glad she could, she can trust you”  
“Yes she can, and you can, we won’t be saying anything. Do you hate Tom?”  
“No, of course not, how could I, it’s just unexpected, I’m not sure what to do, how to handle it”  
“May I tell Tom that you don’t hate her?”  
“Of course because I don’t, she is my best friend, right now I am confused but I don’t hate her.”  
“She is so scared that you would.”  
“Never, I would never do that “Bride went to the window and was silent for a moment “I need to admit this, I didn’t hate Tom’s kiss Len, does that sound awful? I was shocked, surprised, but I didn’t hate it”  
“You are friends and care about each other, I doubt you would ever hate anything Tom did. “Len said gently. “But I can imagine it made you wonder, especially since you didn’t dislike it”  
“She means too much to me, I’ve always loved her as a friend, but only a friend, at least I think so “Bride went on frowning “It, well, it wasn’t good with Simon, it never felt right but I didn’t love him, would it have felt better if I had?”  
“Not an expert here on men Bride but I would imagine so.”  
“Yes I imagine so also. I’m confused, I need to be able to think straight “she wandered round the room “I am going away for a few days. Tell Tom that I don’t hate her and I will go to see her when I come back, tell her that I promise I will”  
Len relayed the message and Tom was relieved but was still anxious and on tenterhooks until Bride would return.  
Bride didn’t go far at first, just to Madge who she felt she could talk to without either her or Tom being judged. “You’ve supported Len and Ted so much I knew that you wouldn’t reject Tom “Bride told her.  
“Certainly not, Tom is a wonderful person, the fact she prefers women doesn’t affect that. I’ve guessed it for some time to be honest.”  
“Well I haven’t, why am I so blind “Bride was surprised.  
“You aren’t “Madge laughed slightly “You saw Tom as a very good friend, I am more distanced and perhaps could see more.”  
“Perhaps, certainly she has given no indication of how she feels about me until now”  
“An impulse, one she will be bitterly regretting”  
“Oh she is, Len told me she is distraught and thinks I will hate her”  
“I’m glad she can talk to those two, they will understand and she will be safe there “Madge nodded then looked at Bride “And do you hate her?”  
“No, why on earth should I?”  
“Because she is in love with you”  
“Is that wrong of her? “Bride asked slowly.  
“No, not at all, well I don’t think so, some might of course”  
“Simon wasn’t in love with me”  
“No, perhaps not “Madge agreed “He may just have wanted the connections.”  
“I think so, well now I do, now I am free from him. I wish I had followed my doubts right from the start instead of feeling that I must marry.”  
“Hindsight is wonderful but not very helpful”  
“So what do I do now about Tom?”  
“What do you want to do, your friendship will remain but it may never be the same.”  
“No, I suppose not, she will still be in love with me and I have…”  
“Rejected her? Have you, or were you just surprised? “Madge queried watching her niece.  
“I was certainly surprised, rejected, I am not sure. To be honest it seems attractive, Tom is all I would want from a man, and I have not found a man I like. But is that what it is, just the fact Tom is in fact the perfect partner for me?”  
“That is a possibility certainly “Madge agreed.  
“I can talk to men, with our families you get used to it, but I find it hard with male strangers, hard to get close, to connect”  
“Perhaps you are shy?”  
Bride laughed “I have been called many things but never shy”  
Madge smiled “I would never call you shy. I know Len and Ted are looking after Tom but I could put you in touch with other couples if it would help”  
“Who?”  
“Kathie and Nancy, Hilda and Nell”  
“I guessed Kathie and Nancy, Hilda and Nell aren’t really a surprise either”  
“If I hadn’t trusted you I wouldn’t have mentioned it but I am sure they would be willing to talk to you if you feel it would help”


	11. Chapter 11

Bride was home, it had been a helpful and interesting few days spending time at Hilda and Nell’s cottage by the sea. So peaceful, lots of long walks on the beach thinking, cosy chats by the fire. It had certainly calmed her down and eased her mind. Nell in particular had challenged her to think, to make a decision because she was still unsure, perhaps tempted to love the idea that someone loved her, or was she in fact something that she had never considered herself to be. Tom was certainly tempting but was it the right decision.  
“I’ve never felt so safe, so comfortable with anyone else, she understands, she’s fun, she doesn’t cling, if she was a man my perfect partner. Do I want Tom as just a friend or more?” a difficult decision. “If Tom was to walk out of my life what would I feel like?”  
Tom answered a knock on her door, on opening it she found Bride standing there. Tom went to hug her, then stopped herself, unsure of the reaction.  
Instead Bride stepped forward and took Tom in a tight hug “You, Tom are a flipping idiot and I have been blind.”  
“How, why?”  
“I should have seen it, I should have been more aware of what was going on, and I am sorry that I wasn’t”  
Tom waited, her heart racing, what would Bride say?  
“Tom, I love you dearly as a friend, and I don’t want to hurt you, but at the moment it is only as a friend. I am recently divorced, I don’t know if I want another relationship with a man, or anyone right now. I feel that if we were to get together it might be wrong, a rebound on my part, and I don’t want that for either of us. “she took Tom’s hands “I want you in my life, you are my oldest, my dearest, my most trusted friend, I do not want to lose you. I know it will be hard, especially for you, but I would dearly love our friendship to be as it was, can you do that, would you do that?”  
Tom whispered, tears streaming down her cheeks “I can try”  
“That’s all I can ask “Bride hugged her friend, tears in her own eyes.


End file.
